LarryBoy, Versus the Volcano Read online

  “Let’s follow the cave’s trail,” said Vicki.

  So the adventurers took off, bouncing along the underground pathway. The stream of chili-lava bubbled and steamed, making the tunnel as hot as a sauna. Along the trail, the heroes didn’t even need a flashlight because Tourist-Man’s nonstop flashing went off every few seconds, providing plenty of illumination.

  “What in the world … ?” gasped Bob. The little group came across a second stream. Only this was a stream of melted cheese. The cheese merged with the chili, creating one great big gurgling river of molten food.

  “SAY CHEESE!” Tourist-Man bellowed. “Get it? Say cheese?”

  Larryboy found another ladder, which led to an upper level lit by torches. The group marched through two large rooms until they came across the most shocking sight of all. A large mechanical hand was wildly shaking a monstrous pop can.

  “Chili-Cola,” smiled Larryboy. “My favorite.”

  “But why the mega pop can?” asked Bob. “What’s it for?”

  Archie climbed the spiral staircase alongside the giant pop can, studying the shaking contraption every step of the way. “I hate to say this,” said Archie. “But this is a Fizz Bomb. The pop can is set to open in approximately one hour.”

  “You mean … ?” gasped Bob.

  “Yes. When the mechanical hand opens, this pop can is going to explode!”

  “But why?” asked Vicki.

  “It’s probably set to trigger an earthquake or volcanic eruption,” said Archie.

  “Earthquakes! Volcanoes! Finally, I’m going to have a vacation slide show that won’t put people to sleep,” grinned Tourist-Man.

  Larryboy hopped up beside Archie. “Is there any way we can disconnect the pop can before it explodes?”

  “Sure there is,” said Archie. “By cutting the wire on the machine … the correct wire.”

  Archie nodded toward a tangle of wires, which led from the timer to the shaking device.

  “The big question is,” paused Archie, “do we cut the red wire? Or do we cut the blue one?”

  “What happens if we cut the wrong one?” asked Vicki.

  “KA-BOOM!” shouted Tourist-Man happily.

  “That would be an accurate conclusion,” Archie stated.

  CHAPTER 12

  SAY CHEESE!

  Larryboy removed a pair of wire cutters from his utility belt and handed them to Archie.

  “Thanks,” said Archie, although he didn’t say it with much enthusiasm.

  “Do you have any idea which wire to cut?” Vicki asked.

  “Not a clue.”

  “I once saw a TV movie where two guys were trying to figure out which wire to cut,” offered Larryboy. “The star of the show cut the red wire and that defused the bomb.”

  Archie started to cut the red wire.

  “NO, WAIT!” Larryboy shouted just in time to stop him. “I just remembered. The colors on my TV were messed up that day. I think the red wire was really blue. They cut the BLUE wire to defuse the bomb.”

  Archie started to cut the blue wire.

  “NO, WAIT!” Larryboy shouted just in time. “Actually, I had my TV repaired on the morning that I saw the movie. I think the red wire was red after all. Cut the red wire.”

  Archie started to cut the red wire.

  “NO, WAIT!” Larryboy shouted. “I just remembered. The TV I owned at that time was a black-and-white set. Very retro. I have no idea which color wire the hero cut.”

  “I once heard that villains always use blue wires to detonate their bombs,” interjected Tourist-Man. “That way, they always remember which wire sets off an explosion. Blue causes KA-BLOOEY. Get it?”

  Sighing, Archie began to cut the blue wire.

  As Archie paused for one terrifying moment before he snipped the wire, Tourist-Man exclaimed, “I’ve got to get this historic event on film. SAY CHEESE!”

  FLASH!

  The flash burst in Archie’s face at the precise moment when the asparagus was cutting the blue wire.

  The result?

  Well, let’s just say that Archie’s wire cutters slipped a little.

  Okay, they slipped A LOT.

  Archie accidentally cut BOTH WIRES!

  “This is not good,” he said.

  Everyone took a quick look at the timer to see what would happen. The clock had changed! Instead of one hour before the pop-can explosion, the timer switched to five seconds.

  Five measly seconds.

  CHAPTER 13

  5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 …

  Pop!

  KA-

  BLOOEY!

  CHAPTER 14

  VOLCANIC VILLAINY

  A lot of the First Class superheroes were innocently frolicking on the beach when the underground explosion rocked the island. The pop-can explosion set off small earthquakes and created large waves.

  Sweet Potato was about to take a bite of her cotton candy when the ground suddenly lurched.

  She stumbled face-first into her cotton candy, couldn’t see where she was going, and fell onto American Pie’s lawn chair.

  American Pie was catapulted out into the water, where he knocked Lemon Twist off of her surfboard.

  Lemon Twist landed on top of the Scarlet Tomato, who was trying to drive a jet ski.

  Blinded, the Scarlet Tomato ran his jet ski up on the beach, destroying Electro-Melon’s sand castle.

  Electro-Melon dove out of the way, landing on the end of a large table covered with cake, chips, punch, little hot dogs, and all kinds of silverware.

  About a hundred dessert forks shot up into the air like silver arrows and rained down on a stack of inflatable inner tubes.

  The inner tubes popped and shot all over the place, while people screamed, fell, and tried to dodge falling chunks of cake.

  You get the idea.

  Meanwhile, on the opposite side of the island, in a deserted cove, Coconut stood all alone on a beach. His escape pod was anchored in the water, a short distance away. Like everyone else, Coconut had felt the force of the underground explosion.

  “What in the world?” he said. “The pop can wasn’t supposed to explode for another hour.”

  Looking at the tip-top of Mount Superhero, Coconut saw a black cloud of smoke pour from the crater like a genie from a bottle. The volcano hadn’t erupted yet, but it wouldn’t be long before the mountain blew its lid.

  “Where’s Chili Pepper?” Coconut fretted. “He was supposed to be here a half hour ago! We need to get off this island. Fast!”

  At that moment, a giant rock came hurtling toward Coconut like a meteor. Spotting it just in time, Coconut rolled to the side as the rock crashed into the sand.

  “Whew! That was a close one,” Coconut said, leaning against the rock and wiping his forehead with a handkerchief.

  He didn’t notice as the rock slowly opened two eyes–two very angry eyes.

  “What are ya doing messin’ with my volcano?” snarled the volcanic rock.

  At the sound of the rock’s voice, Coconut leaped ten feet forward and spun around. “I … We … I … didn’t know it was your volcano.”

  “Well, now you know,” said the rock. “You can tell your little chili friend the same thing.” The rock skipped across the water and hopped into the cockpit of Chili Pepper’s escape pod.

  “Hey, you can’t take that submarine! That’s ours!” Coconut made a mad dash toward the boulder, but the rock monster sent out a blistering stream of bad breath, knocking Coconut backwards.

  Revving the engine, the mysterious rock steered the escape pod into deeper water, then disappeared under the surface, leaving behind only a cloud of bubbles—and one very confused Coconut.

  CHAPTER 15

  SURF’S UP, DUDE!

  Back in the underground tunnels …

  When the pop can opened, a huge stream of Chili-Cola exploded from the earth, hitting Veggies like water from a fire hose and hurling them backwards. But because Chili-Cola is cold and refreshing, the Veggies surviv
ed the drenching. They simply felt … sticky …

  … and very angry … at Tourist-Man.

  “Will you knock it off with the pictures!” Bob shouted, furious that Tourist-Man’s incessant flash had caused Archie to cut both wires.

  “No wonder you were voted off the other side of the island!” Vicki snapped. “Look what you’ve done!”

  “Maybe we should vote on whether Tourist-Man gets to stay on our side of the island,” suggested Larryboy.

  “Don’t you think you’re being a bit harsh, Master Larry?” Archie asked.

  “Anyone who wants me off the island, raise your hand,” Tourist-Man offered, glancing around. “OK, no hands—I stay.”

  “Very funny,” said Bob. “We don’t have hands. Let’s vote on paper.”

  Bob tore pieces of paper from his notebook and passed them around for the vote. It was unanimous. Tourist-Man was booted from the Second Class side of the island. He was stunned, speechless. For the first time since they had met him, his big grin had vanished. “You’re kicking me off this side of the island, too?”

  “I guess we are. Sorry. It’s a matter of survival.”

  Tourist-Man’s face wore the saddest expression they had ever seen. Piling his three giant pieces of luggage on his back, Tourist-Man slowly turned and trudged away. A couple of times, he paused to throw a sad look over his shoulder.

  The group could hear him sniff as he wandered off in the opposite direction.

  “Gee. Maybe we were a little too hard on him,” Larryboy said after Tourist-Man had disappeared into a tunnel.

  “Yes, I believe we may have been,” said Archie. “Maybe we—”

  But there was no time for regrets now. A heavy-duty earthquake suddenly rose up from the depths of the cave, knocking everyone to the ground. Cracks opened up in the cave floor and spread like fast-growing, flaming fingers. Red-hot chili spurted and bubbled through the cracks, flooding the tunnel with extra-spicy chili sauce!

  Bob, Archie, Larryboy, and Vicki could hear the roar of something approaching them from the tunnel.

  “The chili is headed our way!” shouted Larryboy. “Run for it!”

  They hadn’t gone very far when a wall of glowing hot chili suddenly poured into the cavern, flooding the entire tunnel. There was no way they were going to outrun this wave of burning liquid.

  But that’s when they heard a voice. “KAWABUNGA, BABY!”

  It was Tourist-Man. He was on a surfboard riding a wave of chili right toward them. Equally amazing, he had balanced his three pieces of luggage on his head.

  “Hop on, dudes!” he shouted.

  Tourist-Man’s surfboard had two tiny engines strapped to its bottom. But even niftier, he steered the surfboard using a device that looked like the controls for a video game.

  The Veggies scrambled up to a ledge and leaped aboard. They landed on top of the luggage, which was still balanced on Tourist-Man’s head. However, Larryboy couldn’t quite fit on the luggage, so he wound up on top of Bob.

  They raced through the huge cavern looking like something from a circus act, scraping the ceiling as they went.

  “Where did you get this surfboard?” Larryboy yelled over the roar of the rushing chili.

  “It was in one of my suitcases!” Tourist-Man shouted back. “I carry doohickeys—they’re what make me a superhero!”

  “We’re sorry we voted you off our side of the island,” shouted Archie. “You didn’t have to come back to rescue us, but you did. You’re a true superhero, Tourist-Man!”

  “Thanks!”

  Then the surfing Veggies hit a big dip as the river of chili roared downhill.

  “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

  It was like being on an amusement park ride gone berserk. A sharp right turn nearly toppled Larryboy from the top of the stack. If he hadn’t fired a suction cup onto Bob’s shiny head, Larryboy would have gone flying off and hit the wall.

  “Oh my,” Archie said, looking down at the surfboard.

  “Oh my,” was right. Archie was the first to notice that the acid-hot chili was slowly eating away at the surfboard. The board was now about one-third its original size.

  Making things even more complicated, the cave narrowed up ahead with stalactites hanging from the ceiling like razor-sharp needles.

  Larryboy had no choice. He had to leap from the top of Bob’s head to keep from being shish-kebabed on the end of one of the daggerlike rocks. Still connected to Bob’s head by his supersuction plunger, Larryboy wound up being pulled behind.

  When Tourist-Man took a sharp left, Larryboy was flung around like the tail end in a crack-the-whip game. His tether cord wrapped around a stalactite, caught, and then ripped the deadly rock from the ceiling.

  Bob ducked as the stalactite went whistling over his head, followed close behind by Larryboy.

  “Hi, Bob! Bye, Bob,” chirped Larryboy as he sailed just inches over Bob’s noggin.

  By this time, the chili had eaten away even more of the surfboard. It was now about half its original size—barely big enough to hold the Veggies.

  “I think we’re past the worst of it!” shouted Archie.

  Wrong!

  Just then, the volcano erupted.

  KA-BLOOEY!

  CHAPTER 16

  HOT, HOT, HOT!

  A geyser of chili lifted the tiny surfboard, pushing it up, up, up through a vertical shaft in the volcano. Larryboy, still attached to Bob’s head by his plunger, trailed close behind.

  “Top floor, please,” Tourist-Man said, as if in an elevator, shooting up through a tall building.

  A second later, the angry mountain spit them out of its top, hurling them high into the air. Of course, what goes up must come down. But it was a long way down!

  “We’re goners,” yelled Bob, as their free fall began.

  “Never say goner when I’ve still got luggage handy,” said Tourist-Man, completely unruffled. He pushed a button on his remote control, and his second piece of luggage popped open. Inside, a hang glider automatically unfolded.

  The group clutched onto the glider as Tourist-Man steered it through a shower of erupting chili and blobs of sizzling hot cheese, which shot from the top of Mount Superhero.

  Down on the island, the exclusive resort was in flames. None of the superheroes cared any longer who was First or Second Class, who was a servant, or who had what special powers.

  Disasters have a way of putting everyone in the same boat–in this case, a sinking boat.

  Lava-hot chili consumed buildings in its fiery flow. Giant, stale dinner rolls crashed through roofs. Shredded cheese fell from on high like gooey ash, gunking up everything in sight.

  The island looked like a giant food fight.

  By this time, most of the superheroes had attempted to escape by boat, helicopter, plane, jet-pack, or by simply flying on their own steam. But every one of them hit an invisible force field–like birds flying into a windowpane.

  They were trapped on Superhero Island.

  Tourist-Man brought the hang glider down in a cove, which just happened to be the spot where Coconut was waiting for Chili Pepper.

  “Stay right where you are, Coconut!” shouted Larryboy, running toward the thug. “We know Chili Pepper was behind this volcanic eruption! So tell us how to get off this island. You and the Snooty Gourmet must have an escape route.”

  Coconut didn’t say a word.

  Larryboy aimed a supersuction ear at the hooligan. “If you don’t tell us, I’ve got a chili-filled plunger with your name on it.”

  “Okay, okay,” said Coconut. “I’ll tell you anything, but please no more chili! I’ve had enough!”

  “How do we get off the island?” Larryboy repeated.

  “There’s a hole in the invisible force field about 100 feet below the surface of the ocean and about a half mile away from this beach.”

  Coconut handed a map to Larryboy, showing exactly how to locate the underwater hole in the force field. “Here, I won’t need it anyway. Chili a
nd I don’t have a way to reach the escape hole anymore.”

  “You didn’t plan your escape very carefully,” said Larryboy. “You’ve trapped yourselves on the island, too.”

  “Our escape pod was stolen by a huge rock with angry eyes,” grumbled Coconut. “Now can I leave? I think Chili is still somewhere on the island. I’ve got to find him!”

  “Sure, go ahead.”

  As Coconut took off for the center of the burning island, the group was left with two burning questions: How were they going to reach the hole in the force field if it was deep underwater? And how were they going to save the other superheroes?

  All eyes turned to Tourist-Man, who had one piece of luggage left.

  CHAPTER 17

  THERE’S A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA

  “Of course I have scuba gear,” said Tourist-Man matter-of-factly. “I also have a submersible jet ski. Will that help?”

  With another push of a button, Tourist-Man’s third piece of luggage popped open, revealing a submersible jet ski and miniature breathing tanks.

  “Who says that heroes who use doohickeys and gadgets aren’t important?” said Vicki, with a big grin.

  “Right-O!” smiled Larryboy. “Here’s the plan, guys. Tourist-Man, can you use the map and your doohickeys to get Bob, Vicki, and Archie safely through the hole in the force field?”

  “Yes,” agreed Tourist-Man. “But aren’t you coming with us?”

  Larryboy tried to strike a dramatic pose, but it was hard to do when little streams of chili were pouring onto the beach. He kept dancing around the sizzling streams.

  “Drat,” said Larryboy. “Forget the dramatic pose. I’m heading back to the center of the island. Someone needs to tell the other superheroes how to get out of here! We’ve got to include them in our plan!”

  “You’re willing to do that for superheroes who thought they were better than you all week?” Archie asked. “A lot of people wouldn’t be willing to risk their necks for people like that.”